Trapped

I. Feel. So. Damn. Trapped.
It's something I think everyone feels. But now I feel it most. I am almost at the end of high school. I'm almost out of my house, but I still have a while before I actually move out to go to university.
I don't know how to deal with this problem on a long term basis but a few of the things I find helpful when the trapped feeling gets especially bad are calling someone I love. I call my boyfriend or my best friend and talk to them, they both always make me happy, but you could try phoning a parent if you live away from them, or a sibling if they live far away, just anyone you love.
The other big help is going for a walk. On the days it gets particularly awful, I'll head outside for some fresh air. Even if it's just around the block a couple times, being outside reminds you that the world is a lot bigger than you and you are in no way trapped.
You may be fixed in one spot temporarily, but that's all it is.
It is temporary.

Don't tell me I need more confidence

Do you think I don't know this? Do you think I like being constantly petrified of being asked a question? Don't tell me something so blatantly obvious. I don't like feeling like this, but I can't help it! If I knew how to change this, do you think I wouldn't? Don't patronise me, thinking you know what goes on in my head, you don't know the half of it. Everyone is cracked, everyone fears something, everyone gets nervous. It just happenes to me all the time. I don't want to worry that people judge me for getting an answer wrong because my mind has frozen. I don't want my voice to shake when I do a presentation. I don't want to feel like this. But I don't know how to change it. Now please, respect it... and if you must tell me I need mkre confidence, help me figure out how to get it. Don't just remind me.

"Popular"

Sat with my cello, under the boiling stage lights, listening to a rendition of some song that I can't remember now that it's over, I had an epiphany.

For five years, I have felt alone and unloved. Actually, more like ten years, but at varying levels of intensity. Until I was sat with my cello, under the boiling stage lights,  listening to a rendition of some song that I can't remember now that it's over. I realised that I am not alone. That I have friends, and while I'm jot one of the "popular" girls, I am popular with my friends. Yes okay, my circle of friends isn't gigantic, but they exist.

And the same goes for you, you may not have a million friends, but you will have some. You may feel unloved, but I promise you're not. You may feel like no one cares, but I do.
Pheonix Feather.

School

From our first day at school we are told that "Knowledge is Power", and it's true, a good education will help you get whatever you want in life. But school isn't the only place we can learn. We are lead to believe that our grades are the be all and end all. That they determine our lives. To an extent, this is also true. But SCHOOL is awful!
School is a prison, full of arrogant, stinking, adolescents that think they know everything, when, in fact, they know barely anything. The short amount of time they have spent on this earth is barely enough to start grasping at principles that professors are working on. And whilst our minds are beginning to take on the form of an adults, and we are leaving a lot of our childish ways, a lot of the people in higher years at school are still incredibly infantile. Although it isn't the other pupils that are the worst, it's the teachers. The teachers who, in one breath, are telling us to start acting like an adult and take more responsibility, and in the next are scolding us. Still treating us like we are little primary ones! Or the ones that go through lessons so incredibly fast that no one understands. Their excuse? We have "no time!". No, you're wrong, we have the same amount of stuff to learn as every other subject, and they are not rushing it all!
And whilst I say all this none of it is what annoys me most about school, what annoys me most is that I love learning. I love knowledge. I love getting an education. But I hate school! And whilst I love school, I cannot stand it! Especially when people tell you your classes will be full of mature people as you get further up school, cause they're not. While the disruptive and immature people are less and further between, they are still there.
But knowledge is power, and education is the tool that will allow me to change the world... So I'd better stick it out eh? Only two more years anyway!
Pheonix Feather

Use your voice.

You have a voice right? You have opinions? Why not put them together and vocalize them. I'm not telling you to be an obnoxious fanny and think your opinion is the only one that matters, cause that's not the case. I'm sure though that none of you would be like this. What I am saying though is that if there is an injustice being done at your school/work or whatever, you might just be able to change it.
If you can change one thing about your life by using your voice. Imagine what could happen if everyone used their voices for a good reason. Imagine what humanity could do if we joined together for a common cause. Whatever your opinion is, please vocalise it, but also, listen to others opinions too. Thanks.
Pheonix Feather

Don't apologise because you're passionate about something.

So many times, I have seen people get all excited and start talking really quickly and get all worked up about something they are passionate about and in the next breath... they apolpgise. It breaks my heart, because you can tell that some person that they highly respect has, at some point told them to "shut up" because "nobody cares".
This statement is not true. People do care about the way you get excited.  There will be someone out there who finds it absolutely adorable, no matter how annoying a thing it is. Whether it's a tv program, a book series, film series, idea, or whatever, do not apologise... because passion is how we change the world.  Passion is the fire in your belly, and the leaves to our tree. It can be the reason you get out of bed,  and the reason you don't want to.
We need to be passionate about something. Or else, we are uninteresting. It is the way that you get excited over something that makes you you.
Pheonix Feather.

Your grades aren't everything.

So many people stress out about the littlest of tests, the tests that don't even really matter that much. And yes, I know having good grades helps you get into university (if that's what you want to do) and will also help you get a job... but they're definitely not the be all and end all. I want everyone to realise, that while getting an education is extremely important, there are things that you cannot learn in a class. There are subjects that school's frown upon.
You might be awful at school subjects, but have a passion for building robots. Or you might suck at maths but be extremely creative. Everyone has something they're good at. Everyone has stuff they're bad at, but the subjects you're bad at at school shouldn't make you feel bad, or stress you out. If you have to take that subject then ask for help. And know that even if your parents desperately want you to be a doctor, but you want to be an actor or whatever, then don't be a doctor to make your parents happy. Be an actor, because it's your life, and you get to decide what your career will be.
Pheonix Feather.